My first Patrol Log XP

Hi guys,

jus finished my first patrol log and posting it here as an e-version? critisicm is welcome XP

Jason

FALCON 2011 PATROL LOG

DATE: 21^ST MARCH

SENDER: SOME RANDOM SEC 1 KNOWN AS JASON

RECIPIENT :__( you insert your name here, you know, like in your head as according to act 11.47 of the National Public Library, “It is a chargeable offense to deface a book that is property of the National Public Library of Singapore”. Ahem.)

Chapter: Term 2

Mission: Act 1

And so, today was the inevitable end of the world, as we, the sec 1s of 01 Raffles Scout Group knew it. The terror of the single, lone sheet of paper placed upon our desk was enough to drive some of us into fits of hysteria.

That’s right, as maybe some of you post-apocalyptic survivors who are reading this patrol log may know, it was the WORLD SCOUTS BADGE TEST(cue Beethoven’s Symphony No. 6)(Chester screams out, “Fun!”)

Now as the untrained observer, I drew a general conclusion that most people didn’t study for the test. For those who did, I would give you a ‘free ‘no-need-to-do’5 push-ups coupon, however, that power lies with the victor of the war, and that title clearly screams “Yi Ming”.

Note to the sec one who will get his hands on this very, trusty guide to surviving the yearly holocaust (for all sec ones at least), you should better get what I’m about to tell you into your system if you want to win the rat race.

Step 1) After SUTC, do not go home and sleep. Instead, take your 01 Raffles Scout Badge Handbook and put it under your pillow and sleep.  Make sure you sleep on your pillow.  This extremely effective method is known as osmosis,  and since it has such a weird and fancy name for it, it probably works.

Step 2) Chill out and breeze through the test with no problems at all. Watching your friends suffer should provide some entertainment for the next 39 mins of the 40 mins test.

The small  print: This is a lousy method. Osmosis actually refers to the movement of water molecules through a selectively-permeable membrane down a water potential gradient. Therefore, it is not the posh name for absorbing knowledge as you sleep. Consumers use is at his own discreet.

Step 3) Ignore what was on top of this line.

Now as I was saying, most people didn’t study. I had the extreme fortune of actually studying, during an inconspicuous period in the morning know as ‘Mother Tongue’ where soothing words of some flowing language provided me with just the right conducive environment to study in…

WAIT A SECONFD!!! What was I doing studying in Chinese Class?!

Ok, scrap that last part. Enough of digressing, on to the main show! XP

The test was basically an assassin in the night. History, as all of you know, is one of our 6 core subjects. The test secretly incorporated that subject into the test, which adds on further proof that the GC of 2011 are in cahoots with the history teachers of RI to bring the 01 Raffles Scout Group down to guard against sloppy homework after SUTC. Wait…forget what I just said.

So, it went something like this.

3. Where did Lord Baden Powell die?

Some sec one’s answer: In his house.

So from that one line, you can see why surviving a nuclear fall out is better than our test XP.

Part 2

I sit, and look around me. The fate of my fellow laborers, their plight, oh it breaks my heart. But what can I do? I am but one man, against the might, of the fourth Reich, where supreme chancellor ’GC’ rules. –Excerpt from war survivor.

So after the apocalypse, we were sent down to the labor camp, where I saw a number of my kind being worked for the ‘greater good’. Some of my seniors, despite surving through so much, including the SUTComet, and the GTClash, were now working with their heads bowed down, their spirits broken, reduced to scrubbing pots and pans…

That was a very biased account of what happened. What really happened was this.

Today, we cleaned up our equipment. This is very important as we use our equipment on a regular basis and we are responsible for them.

Random reader holding this patrol log, this may sound very clichéd and stupid, but it will all make sense as you sleep on a mud-caked tent and increase the risk of you getting cancer from the charred bits on the pots and pans, and most importantly, the regret you will feel at the funeral of a random person who got hit by the axe head that flew off as you were swinging to vigorously. 

Another thing you will learn, is the friendship and warmth of the brotherhood of scouting. As you hold up one corner of the wet tent, with other scouts, and run crazily across the field, your heart will fill with joy and you will truly feel the scouting brotherhood…

Ok, choose to believe that or not, but that’s how I felt, albeit on a much, much, smaller scale. But seriously, running around with a wet tent in your hands is definitely one of those bonding activities.

And so as we reach the third piece of paper, in order to save ink and the environment, and to allow a certain someone to escape and do his homework and revise for his Japanese test tomorrow,(and then go to sleep XP) here’s wishing you the best of luck in your scouting journey( unless of course, you’re not a scout, but that can’t be since the den rules state clearly that no non-scout is allowed into the den under ’pain of death’ or something like that, which means GET OUT BOYS BRIGADE or NCC or NPCC!!!)